Saturday, October 29, 2011

A slave alone without a Femdom or Domme

Let's face it, all slaves desire ownership. They want someone to control them, tell them what to do and when to do it. They want that close feeling that can only come with knowing that he or she owns everything about the person. I'm no different, but let's also face the fact that we aren't always going to be owned. For example, I have not had an owner since my Mistress died. I've had some fun with friends, but no one to hold me or allow me to massage them into a gentle sleep, or a sexual explosion.

So the problem for an unowned slave is what to do with free time. I have to admit, I'm one that will think about ownership. Wanting to try to keep all my plumbing devices working and myself prepared for a potential owner, I sometimes find myself alone imagining that I have an owner. Being a male, I am a visual creature, so I turn like many lonely, horny men to the internet. I search for pictures under the normal names like "femdom," "domination," "bondage," "CFNM" and a dozen other topics. I usually download a handful of pictures that make me hot and then try to work up the courage to basically do myself.

You may be wondering why I'm opening up this very private side of my life to the world of the internet. First, I hope you're not alone in this reading and wondering, second you would be well justified for wondering. Most men, and many women for that matter, will not admit to masturbation or "self-sex". Sure, they will read about it, watch it, and even do it, but to admit to the world that they've stroked it while white globs of man-jam come rushing out onto a towel, no. That's not in the cards. But, I'm a slave, I've been put on display, shown to friends, and even jacked off for crowds of my owner's friends before. So, putting it all out here, in a matter of speaking, isn't really that hard (oops, there's those word play things again).

Anyway, after I have found the pictures that stir a feeling in me, I arrange them on my computer in an order I'd like to see them. For me there are variety of pictures, but I generally like the humiliation ones. I tend to look for pictures where a slave has to masturbate on his owners foot or boot and clean it up. I also am fond of the ones where a slave is tied up, jacked off, and then has his cum smeared on his face or feed to him. Basically, let me imagine my balls bouncing off the toe of your boot, or even the toe of your bare foot, and I'm happy to be self serving. Now before anyone says, well those pictures are all about your pleasure, yes I know. That's the point at this time. I'm alone and looking for release.

As I was saying (or in this case diligently writing), I will line up the pictures and start a slide show. I set it to where a keystroke controls the change in pictures rather than a timer since this allows me to linger on picture that bring me to particular arousal. Once I have my pictures going, I strip, put a towel in my seat, I towel beside me, a cup and obtain some lotion. It's then time to stroke it as I look at the pictures. From here on you can imagine a man sitting in his chair, stroking his cock with lotion and staring at domination pictures. Yes, I know, it's ever pervert's dream (give me an owner to control me and it will stop).

For the next little bit, I imagine that I'm each slave in the pictures. I may tie a little noose around my balls or at the base of my cock. I may even put a belt around my neck and slowly tighten it. No, I do not click the buckle in place, I want to feel it not die! With those situations in place, I slowly stroke my cock. Once I feel the urge growing, I stand up, stop going through the pictures and increase the speed of the strokes. With one hand a I the cup ready and then when the moment comes (no pun intended) I force the head of my cock into the cup, stroke as fast as I can and fill the cup up. That's how I do it when I'm alone, which is a lot these days.

What's that? I bet you're wondering what I do with the cup aren't you? I've standing here in front of my computer with a nice cup full of cum and my other hand slowly winding down on my cock. Well, for the fun of it, let's leave that up to your imagination. Or, maybe if one of you wanted to control what I do with the cup, you'll contact me and take on a slave. Until then, let's just say I'm fairly open to suggestions.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Houston on My Mind

Well, I'm planning a fun trip to get away to Houston the weekend of the 28th. As it goes, I'm going to be all alone just sitting around or going out to eat. Naturally, I'd love to be kneeling at a Dominant's feet, but that doesn't seem to be the case.

In fact, as it goes this is one of several trips to the big cities. Each time I go, I'm contacted by Domme's willing to spend time with me. Unfortunately, it's always the same. I'm expected to meet them in public (I'm okay with this) pay for the meal (again okay) and at some point I'm told that each hour they spend with me will require a gift. The bottom line is everyone seems to be money Dominants these days. Nobody seems to want to just spend time, have fun, get to know someone and maybe take things further.

I'm on Twitter, Facebook, Yahoo and it's all the same at each place. I miss the days when a Domme or Dom would simply slap a leash around my neck and lead me around the room. Heck, I'm game for some strip poker! But, at last life appears to be all about the money. I miss those who really want to just dominant!