It seems the older I get, the more claustrophobic I feel as my erections seem to wane and fail. Perhaps it is diet, age, or a lack of physical exercise but the two issues seem to go hand-in-hand. I had recently noticed a claustrophobic feeling in elevators, closed spaces, and even in small showers. I would start to feel a panic and even a constriction on my breathing. Now, for a slave who has been wrapped in plastic wrap, tied completely, hog tied and even shoved into tiny cages, this is not a good thing to feel. I was even reading about a Domme who puts her male slaves into small box like cages complete with butt plugs and dildos that provide water and I started to panic! I started to think, "Oh crap, what if a future owner wanted to do this to me?"
The other matter I face is the waning or apparently dying off of the mighty erection. There was a time when I could simply think about a Master or Mistress standing over me and instantly spring to erection life! Now even the thought of a good knee in the balls does little for my cock and it's need to rise up. In fact, it seems he lays around more than he shoots up these days. I read an erotic story, and he just stays flat. I think about a Mistress riding my ass into the ground, and he stays down. I recently spoke to one Mistress who would find this nice since she does not equate sexuality with any form of BDSM. While that's nice, I have to admit that I got into being a submissive because it aroused me. I didn't run around and think, "Wow, what would it feel like if a Master spanked by balls with that paddle?" just for the hell of thinking about it. No, like other slaves it caused me to spring to life.
I guess as I see it, I have a couple of choices. First, I could live with the claustrophobia and have my Masters or Mistress put it to good use for their entertainment and my torture. I could also live with the limp cock and allow it to be amusement for a Master or Mistress. I could resort to medications for both. I could allow some aspiring Mistress or Master to finally own me completely and have a medical castration performed. Or, finally I could become dominant and select willing young men and women as my own slaves, teach them the ways of being a slave, and maybe occasionally allow them a moment of dominance to meet my submissive needs.
Whatever the decision is I make, one thing is for sure....I'm not the horny 30 year old slave that I once was. I have to accept age and time and maybe somewhere a collar will have my name on it still.
